Otra noche desvelado.

Hoy os voy a contar una pequeña historia sobre el sueño. No os mentiré sobre lo duro que es vivir junto a MELAS, y una de las peores partes es conciliar el sueño. Al principio te invade el insomnio debido a la preocupación inherente del familiar. Después de mucho entreno con una excepcional y positiva psicóloga, el mindfulness sirve para darte cuenta que el sueño perdido ante el no poder hacer nada, no sirve y por lo tanto lo único que te queda es aceptarlo y dormir.

Hoy mi pequeña viajera nocturna no puede conciliar el sueño, y esto se traduce en paseos desde su habitación al resto de la casa. Como algunos pensarán y dado que todavía posé grandes habilidades motrices existe la posibilidad de abrir puertas aún estando cerradas con llave. La fuga es uno de los grandes pensamientos que cruzan en mi cabeza, y más cuando duermes con ella solo en casa.

Otros de los grandes tormentos son las conversaciones en el contexto anteriormente citado como: – ¿A dónde vas? – a lo que me contesta – Voy a buscar a mi padre- . Ante este dilema no sabía que responderle y solo pude pensar: y si la dejo en su imaginación. Puede que esté soñando o que tenga algún recuerdo que creía dormido o incluso muerto. Para poneros en contexto debo deciros que su padre, es decir, mí abuelo, falleció no hace mucho en el hospital después de meses ingresado. En ese momento el pánico se cernió sobre mi alma y enmudecí.

Puede que como problema el no dormir no sea tan perjudicial, pero antes y unos meses en terapia os digo que ese total de horas necesarias para ser persona, para estar atento, para estudiar o incluso reír eran algo casi imposible y doloroso.

No hay peor momento que aquel en el que tu supuesta madre deja de serlo. Mi consejo si es que alguien lee estas palabras, es el siguiente: saca fuerzas cada día para que resulte el mejor y acepta que estás en un proceso.

Sobre el Autor

A.OlmedoS.
Estudiante de biología, blogger, lector por diversión, inconformista y luchador.

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